December 17, 2004

The Last Blog of 2004

And not a moment too soon, I tells ya! Nah, just kidding, but I wish I had a job like some of the DJs I've been listening to so far this morning. It sounds like everybody in the world gets the last two weeks of the year off but me. That's pretty plush.

More of What I Do Best... Watch TV

Well, it's fair to say that I am always willing to forgive those of their mistakes. For minor transgressions, I can find it in my heart to give you a second chance. That's why, last night, I fired up the Tivo to watch the SpikeTV 2004 Video Game Awards. As I mentioned in a posting from November 8th, the 2003 edition of the VGAs was probably the most nonsensical undertaking in modern television history. Nobody really knew what was going on, and the awards were secondary to all the other lame events they had set up.

Which brings us to this year's festivities, which got off to a similar start. The show was kicked off with a cute skit between Snoop Dogg and Tiger Woods, and then devolved into a 10 minute long shameless plug for the game Def Jam: Fight For NY, a wrestling game featuring several rap stars. What I thought was just going to be a quick song by rapper Ludacris turned into some hip-hop West Side Story with dancing street thugs duking it out in the audience. I was just waiting for DMX to come out singing "I Feel Pretty (the Puff Daddy Remix ft. Little John)"

DMX: "I feel prettyyyy..."
Little John: "Oookkayyyyyy!!!"
DMX: "Oh so prettyyyy..."
Puff Daddy: "Uh-huh, yeah."
DMX: "I feel pretty, and witty, and gayyyy."
Little John: "WHAT?!?!?!"

Sorry, I loved that joke while I was thinking it up. This year's edition was at least easier for viewers to follow. The traditional awards show format of a presenter coming out and announcing the nominees prior to the winners (except for certain categories which got the "Before the Show" type awards) at least let people understand what was being awarded unlike last year's "ambush" awarding where even the people who won weren't expecting it.

But, this still was pretty bad. Snoop as the host... Well he doesn't do too well in scripted comedy. When he was the guest host on Jimmy Kimmel Live last year, his best moments were sitting on the couch ripping on the guests. When they tried to use him in a sketch, it was just abysmal (except for the Snoop Garage Sale, which was classic). The presenters looked as if they were unexectedly thrust on stage to read inane banter from a cue card. The people who won the awards didn't seem to know where or when they were supposed to get up to accept their monkey trophies. Unlike last year, which was a full-on Amtrak style train wreck, this show was just a slight derailment.

One thing I have to say, maybe for next year, is that maybe let a game gain a foothold before you nominate it for an award that's supposed to cover the previous year. Out of the five "Game of the Year" nominees; Halo 2, Half-Life 2, and Metal Gear Solid 3 had come out just last month. Two of those hadn't even been released when they announced the nominations, and Halo 2 had only been out for a couple of days. Just a thought.

Grand Owl: BMOC

The other show I watched last night (as I said, I'm usually about a day behind when it comes to TV), was the Wednesday night premier of the new WB reality show BMOC - Big Man on Campus. Boy, oh boy... As a guy who used to frequent the University of Central Florida campus in Orlando to go use their library while I attended a nearby community college, I can definitely tell you that the university is not exactly Babe Central (for that, you have to check out the preppy private school hunnies over at Rollins College). But, no offense ladies, but couldn't they have found at least ONE! UCF is the third largest university in the state with nearly 40,000 students, and while none are ugly, there's none that are great. But who am I to complain?

The premise is a college version of The Bachelor, and this initial episode followed that of its sister series as the ladies scoured the campus for their knight in shining armor. Of course, they have to go with the OVERLY dramatic when, while preparing for a house party, one girl accidently cuts another with a kitchen knife. So, they show the paramedics coming in for a cut that only appeared to be about an inch or so while the girl who did it is sobbing in the bathroom! The other girls in the house make it sound like she tried to carve her up Norman Bates-style. I got worse scrapes from falling off my big wheel (yes, it is possible).

The show will probably hold my attention for at least this season, as I love watching shows or movies from Orlando so I can play "I Spy" with local landmarks (I sat through "Earnest Saves Christmas" a couple of weeks ago simply because so many scenes were shot at the old Orlando Science Center). One last comment I've gotta make, of the final six candidates for BMOC, three of them were marketing majors because... lets face it... marketing majors are HOT!!!

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